Woke up from a dream about having an amazing orgy with so many babes

I’m sad it didn’t actually happen

I blame the cute girl that I met and got drunk with at the bar while we were both with our friends

When we all said our goodbyes I shook her hand and she made eyes at me while rubbing her thumb flirtatiously on the top of my hand

I thank my life partner for not getting jealous when I told him I found her extremely attractive

I hope I run into her again
I hope I have more explicit sensual dreams

startledoctopus

Convo I just had with my dad

  • Dad: hey I'm gonna go grocery shopping do you need anything?
  • Me: uuuhhh....
  • Me: contemplates wether or not I should ask him to get me pads since I need them desperately
  • Dad: anything at all?
  • Me: uh... Yeah.... Can you get me some pads
  • Dad: Sure
  • Me: Are you serious? Wouldn't you be embarrassed?
  • Dad: Natalie, I'm a 56 year old man who has been buying pads for your mother for over 20 years. No I'm not embarrassed.
  • Me: But I thought guys get squirmish when we ask them to buy this stuff for us
  • Dad: boys are squirmish. Men will step out and buy you as many pads and tampons as you need. A man will understand that you cannot control your cycle and that this is a natural bodily process. So, if you ever find a guy who's too embarrassed to buy you pad just bleed on everything he owns.
  • Me: OMG DAD
carlosofthecosmos

carlosofthecosmos:

dynastylnoire:

photosbyjaye:

dynastylnoire:

naturalstylishpoet:

I don’t know what’s more awesome…the fact that Samuel L. Jackson is doing this piece or the fact that it’s about Boy Meets World.

You need to watch this. He KILLS this piece

This is dope. I’m feeling it. snap, snap, snap

I was legit snapping in my livingroom with both hands in the air.

i mean, it’s impossible, at this point, for him not to be my hero